3 Lies About Sex

Believe it or not God created sex. In Genesis God told Adam and Eve to be fruitful and multiply. He wasn’t talking about gardening. Too many times sex is not talked about because it has such a bad stigma connected to it. Yes God created sex, but the Devil has perverted it. The world gives so many messages about sex that are wrong, while too often the body of Christ avoids talking about it all together. This lack of conversation about what God honoring sex looks like leads to so many problems in this world especially with our young people. So let's talk about sex!

The world lies about sex a lot! The 3 most popular lies I see about sex are; Lust, Pornography and Sex before or outside of marriage (Fornication/Adultery).

Lust

Lust is our first lie about sex. Lust is when you actively fantasize about sex in a way that is not honoring God. A lot of people may say that it is okay to lust. They may say something like, "your not hurting anyone, it's all in your head and it's not real". We have to understand that lust is a lie and a tool that the Devil uses to distract us and get us off course. Jesus explains in Matthew 5:28 that if we even think about having sex outside of the way God designed it, in marriage between a man and a woman, then we are wrong! Jesus is drawing a clear boundary to keep us from falling into the trap of sexual impurity. Jesus knows that our minds are a powerful tool, and that if it is focus on lustful things then we will eventually give in.

Pornography

Pornography is the next lie about sex. Pornography is an over exaggerated image of what sex is. It's not real. It burns images in our minds and causes reoccurring thoughts that are not God honoring. Some people may also say that it's ok to view pornography, that it doesn't hurt anyone, but that's a lie. Pornography has destroyed marriages, caused loss jobs, and has perverted the minds of millions of people. Not too many people fight against this silent killer. I have heard that over 80% of men who are active in church struggle with some form of pornography. These are men who actively seek God, so I can only imagine how many deal with pornography outside of the church. Pornography eats away from the inside out, and causes so much damage especially when it’s hidden. I have heard that pornography, and other hidden sins, are like mold; they grow best in dark places, and if it is ignored it causes major damage. When I was a slave to pornography I did almost anything to gain access to it and to keep it hidden. All this was going on while I was actively involved in church as a teen and even into my first year or so of college. I knew I was saved and that I was going to heaven, but never started to experience God truly move in my life until I exposed the my secret sin and got the help I needed to become free. Through the conviction of the Holy Spirit and the help of other brothers who pulled me out of the darkness I can proudly say that I have been free from the chains of pornography going on 9 years. Freedom from the lie of pornography can really happen, but you have to fight for it.   

Fornication & Adultery

Fornication and Fornication and adultery are probably the biggest lies about sex. If your not clear what they are: Fornication is sex before marriage, also known as premarital sex, and Adultery is when a married person has sex with someone who is not their husband or wife, whether their spouse agrees with it or not. The lies of fornication and adultery have destroyed many lives. Fornication and adultery promises an extremely pleasurable experience and or a stronger bond in a relationship, but it falls short every time. Everything is great and feels wonderful in the moment, but not too long after guilt, shame, regret and the temptation to hide or cover up zaps away all of whatever pleasure you thought you gained from the experience. God created sex to be a PART of marriage. It is used to unite a man and a woman and to HELP in creating a closer bond between them (Genesis 2:24). When a man and wife have sex they are connected on a deep spiritual level that is hard to explain, so when sex is treated as just another recreational activity it can do a lot of damage. “Using protection” doesn't stop the deep spiritual and emotional connection from happening. Using protection during sex may help protect from diseases but it CANNOT protect the soul from the emotional and spiritual pain sex outside of marriage WILL bring. Sex outside of marriage, whether fornication or adultery, does so much damage because it connects people on levels that are way deeper than physical. (Genesis. 2:23-25; Matthew 5:27-28; Matthew 19:4-6; Mark 10:6-8)

Sex is to be cherished and respected. If you have gone too far it’s not to late to turn from that lifestyle. God’s grace is abundant and he loves you no matter what you have done. Make the change today and surround yourself with people who can help you. In the next post we will talk about 3 ways that we can fight against these lies about sex.  

Lost In Transition

Life is made up of transitions. From the moment we were born there is always a “next step” to take and a “new level” to discover. As newborns we transition from rolling, to crawling, then walking. As a child we transitioned from pre-school to elementary, middle school, high school, then college. The Fall months are on their way and during this time of the year students are starting new grades, some even moving away to start college. New job opportunities and relationships may be on the horizon. We are all familiar with what transition is, and we know that it comes with challenges. Transition can be hard, confusing and scary, and if not done well we can get lost in it.

Fear & Arrogance

There are two things that can cause us to get lost in transition; fear and arrogance. Fear causes us to sit still when God tells us to move to the next level. We think about all the “what ifs” and stay still because the next level is either too hard or too scary to face. Arrogance causes us to move too far ahead of God thinking that we know more and can handle more than we really can. We see the opportunity to move to the next level, but we jump ahead with minimal planning or prayer. We then find ourselves overworked and stretched too thin. We cannot allow either fear or arrogance to cause us to get lost in the transitions of life.

Tips for Not Getting Lost in Transition

In Joshua 1:1-9 we find ourselves peeping into a conversation between God and Joshua. At this time in Joshua’s life he is about to start the biggest transition ever. Moses has died and now it is time for him to step up as the new leader of the Israelites. This is a pretty big deal. In this passage God is giving Joshua the pep talk of the millennium, and there are 3 nuggets that we must remember that will help us to transition well.  

1.     God is Your Source

a.     We have to realize that everything we have and everything we do is because of God. Yes we work hard to sew seeds in our life, but at the end God is the one who causes the growth. Our house, skills, love ones, money, job, looks, etc. is all because of him. In verse 3 God tells Joshua, “Wherever you set foot, you will be on land I have given you”. God gave the Israelites everything they had. There was no question about it, and God reminded Joshua of that. We can’t allow fear to hold us back from the things God has already promised to us, and we can’t allow arrogance to cause us to forget God was the one who paved the way for us.

2.     God is With You

a.     Going through life’s transitions can be scary. We may not know what steps to take or when to take them. Fear can keep us from taking those steps. God tells Joshua in verse 5 that he will not fail him of abandon him. That same promise is true for us. God will never leave us high and dry. Even when we feel like he is not there he promises that He is, so we have to trust that. If God has told you to take a step into a new transition…do it. You may not know what is next, but God does, so trust Him.

3.     God’s Word is Central

a.     As we go through the transitions of life we are going to be pulled in many different directions. With new opportunities and responsibilities there will be a temptation to pull away from the truth of God’s word. We can find ourselves getting lost in the transition and not spending time in the Word. This is a trap that we can easily fall into. We start thinking that going to church on Sundays and Wednesdays is enough, but its not. We have to find time to take in God’s word daily so that we can handle the challenges new transitions will bring. God’s Word has to be central. It's the hub in our wheel called life that keeps everything together.

b.     Reevaluate your days. Are you planning some time in your day to hang out with the father? Make whatever changes you need to in order to spend time in God’s word. Maybe listening to a few chapters on the Bible app during your workout. Even turning the radio off and spending time praying and just being silent and asking God to speak to you during your drive to work. Maybe waking up 15-30 mins earlier and having a cup of coffee with the Father as you read a chapter a day out of your favorite book of the Bible. You know what works best for you, but the key is to keep the truth of the Word of God central in your life so that you don't get lost in the transitions.

Transitions are exciting, scary and a bunch of other emotions all rolled up together. If we are to transition well and not get lost we have to remember these three tips.